


HSWC Bonus Round 1 - There's a Quote for Everything

by Hakkari



Category: Homestuck
Genre: Alcoholism, F/F, F/M, HSWC 2013, Implied Sexual Content, M/M, one shots
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-06-03
Updated: 2013-06-14
Packaged: 2017-12-13 19:43:37
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Major Character Death
Chapters: 15
Words: 11,163
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/828111
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Hakkari/pseuds/Hakkari
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Fills for the Homestuck Shipping World Cup Bonus Round 1. </p><p>Lots of pairings, lots of characters. There will probably be more added.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Rose/Kanaya

**Author's Note:**

> Kanaya<3Rose
> 
> “I realized how truly hard it was, really, to see someone you love change right before your eyes. Not only is it scary, it throws your balance off as well.” - Sarah Dessen

"Kapaya look, shee how it'sh done? You just gotta... gotta plash th' cansh jus' like..." There was a dramatic pause, and then she grinned. "THISH! JUS' LIKE THISH!" The yellow-robed seer turned towards her matesprit, eyes shining. Kanaya curled closer to the wall, stopping herself from releasing a sigh.

"Whatd'ya think, Kanjay?" The troll's eye twitched, but she forced a smile on her force.

"It's very... nice, Rose." No it wasn't. It was an ugly monstrosity that Old-Rose would have sneered at before making fun of it and then implementing a fix to make it better. The cans were haphazardly stuck around as the "foundation", with the rest of them stacked on top in awkward positions. It looked more like a highblood's first hive than one of the human's lovely buildings.

It seemed that Kanaya had miscalculated how gone on her human sopor Rose was, because her face crumbled right there. Tears formed at her eyes and she sniffled. "Karina, no... wait... SHIT, lemme jus'... Kaniya... no..."

"That was close enough, Rose. Please don't get upset." New-Rose got upset at every small thing. It was how she seperated them out, now. Old-Rose for before they were dating and New-Rose for the sniffling mess that was... now. She had fallen in love with the Old and ended with the New. The troll wondered, briefly, if it was her own fault that Rose had changed. She cringed at the thought.

"Do you hate me? Like in th' human way an' not the troll way?" She gave her the largest barkbeast-eyes she could manage, and Kanaya sighed, getting up from her position and curling around her.

"No, Rose. I don't hate you." She didn't say that she loved her, either, and the omission was clear. Rose didn't seem to notice, however, cheering up almost immediately.

"I wash jus'... sorry Kinpaki I know you don't... I wash jus' doubtin' an'... I love you. Or, what ish it that trolls shay? 'Flushed for you'? Ha, that'sh ridiculoush soundin'." 

"I'm flushed for you as well, Rose." 

It was true, no matter how much she had changed. Kanaya would always love her in some ways, clinging desperately to the image of Old-Rose that she had. That smiling, sarcastic, strong human that she had yearned for - that was who she thought of whenever she closed her eyes and went to sleep.

She curled back up against the wall and closed her eyes again, thinking of when she only looked on from afar.


	2. Karkat/Meenah

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Karkat<3Meenah 
> 
> "I never fit in. I am a true alternative. And I love being the outcast. That's my role in life, to be an outcast." - Meat Loaf

"Yo, shouty. Water you doin' over here by yourshellf?" Karkat groaned, leaning back and accidentally banging his head against the wall.

"FUCK! GODDAMN- What the fuck do you want, Meenah?" He rubbed his head, flinching as he reached the area around his horns. They were sore as hell recently, probably from growing pains but fuck if banging them against a wall didn't help. 

He was still pretty sure that the pain was worth it to get rid of the party of dumb fucks that called themselves the 'dancestors'. They had - especially his own - followed him relentlessly, cheerfully tossing the most worthless advice at him and asking him to do things for them like he was in Alternia's worst troll roleplaying game. He had only managed to escape by flinging the worst expletives he could think of at them, which caused them all to freeze, look at Kankri, and then run for the hills themselves.

In short, he didn't really want to be bothered. Karkat could guarantee that his dancestor was still talking to no one about the 'triggers of language' or whatever hoofbeast shit he could think of. 

And, sure enough, Meenah plopped down next to him, carefully placing her trident at her feet. He gazed at it, uncertain. She leaned back against the wall with significantly more grace than he did, then turned towards him with a grin.

"Just thought you'd like to talk, maysea."

"What the fuck is 'maysea'?"

She scowled. "Okay, fuck it. That was the shittiest pun I've ever done. It was 'maybe' and 'sea' all crushed up together. I don't efin wanna talk aboat it."

"It was pretty shitty."

"Yeah, yeah, waterever."

They sat in a comfortable silence after that, and Karkat realized that he felt more at ease at that moment than he had for the past sweep. For once he could forget the fact that his eyes were starting to fleck red with blood and that his moirail was hate-fucking his flush crush and that even Strider was starting to give him looks of human-pity. 

He was a fucking pathetic mess and he knew it.

Then there was Meenah. She was a highblood nob-... no, not just a highblood noble but the fucking Heiress herself. She seemed poised and dangerous and would have probably survived to be the Condescension on Alternia. It was clear that she had a few friends around, since she talked a lot to the other Serket (Arachne? Arachnid? Whatever the hell her name was). So, of course, it had Karkat curious with quite a few things but he didn't want to ask in case it ruined whatever the fuck it was that they had.

Now seemed like a better time than any, however, so he took a deep breath. She turned towards him, curious.

"Why the fuck do you even hang out with me? Seriously, I'm the most worthless sack of shit troll on this side of paradox space. And you're..." He hesitated, unsure of how to phrase his statement.

"...not." Karkat flinched at absolutely lame that sounded. Meenah blinked, blank eyes staring for a few moments (maybe, or they could have been looking elsewhere and he didn't fucking know). Then she moved closer to him and placed her hand on his shoulder. He tensed up, then relaxed a few moments later.

"Yo, lemme tell you somefin, Shouty. You de-fin-itely aren't a 'worthless sack of shit'. I've met worthless sacks of shit and unless you've suddenly grown gills and walk around hittin' on everyfin and everyone, you aren't one of them." She smirked at her own joke, then swallowed.

"So, let's sea here. Obvifishly you have the wrong idea aboat everyfin, cause I shore as shell ain't the coolest motherglubber out here. I mean, I'm close, but I've made mistakes that I regret and sometimes you just gotta realize that there's nofin you can do aboat them now." The seadweller paused. "Hey, promise you won't tell anyone any of this. If I'm gonna lead an army to green dude, they gotta have some faith in their leader, y'know."

"You've gotten support?" Perhaps it was the surprise in his voice that caused her to grimace.

"Not yet, but don't worry aboat that right now. I have a plan to deal with that."

"Alright, then. I promise I won't disclose the details of either of our rather sad and pathetic personal thoughts." 

"Fuck you, Shouty. My personal thoughts ain't nofin but the best!" She playfully shoved him, then returned to her previous spot. There was another silence, this one more awkward than the last. 

"You know you never answered why you hang out with me specifically." 

Perhaps it was the lighting, but Karkat could swear he saw fuschia blush spread across her gills and cheeks. "Whale, to be honest, I dunno. Maybe cause you're more tolerable than the rest of the bassholes that I call 'fronds'."

She shifted uncomfortably. "Is that all?" She threw her hands into the air with exasperation, then turned towards him and grabbed his shoulders. Karkat instinctively tried to curl back, every alarm going off in his head that this was it. He was going to die he was going to get culled oh fuck oh fuck oh fuck

"Oh, fuck you, Vantas! Fuck you and your need to know everyfin and your bad bass leader skills and your self doubt and... and..." She roughly planted a kiss on his lips, their fangs and noses bumping awkwardly. The fact that he took a moment to respond didn't exactly stop her, though when he clumsily returned the kiss she went at it again with renewed gusto. 

She pulled away with a gasp, the fuschia tinge completely covering her face. Her fins were up and alert, and she immediately released his shoulders. Without another word she rose, banging her head on the wall as she reached down to grab her trident. Then she departed without even a goodbye.

Karkat sat there shocked for a good minute before reaching up and touching his lips and the surrounding cheek. There were stains from her lip stick all over her face. 

"Jesus, what the hell is even going on down here-" The human froze as he spotted Karkat on the floor, cape swirling around his feet. His stoic expression changed to a smirk, and he lowered his shades just enough for Karkat to see his eyebrows wriggling.

"Well, looks like someone had some fun-"

"Shut the fuck up, Strider."


	3. Doomed!John/Vriska

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> (Doomed)John<3Vriska
> 
> "she said my name--  
> and I, who did not love her,  
> opened my arms."  
> Richard Jones, "The Loft"

Perhaps it was the way she looked at you, the way her blank eyes seemed to fill with emotion. Maybe it was the way she gently brushed her hand against your own, the ghost (ha) of a touch the most intimate she was willing to get. Or maybe it was even the little grins she sent you as you explored her castle - hive, you remind yourself.

Whatever the reason, you were starting to fall for her. You weren't the right John - you would never be the right John in any situations, it seemed - but you wanted to make her happy. She was a stranger but the fact that she had become so close to the other you makes you reach for her, as if it would bring you closer to not being doomed yourself.

Those selfish feelings - wanting to belong, wanting to have someone to talk to, wanting to pretend you were something you're not - faded with time. The false love became something real, and everytime you said something funny and she would giggle, you felt a trill move through your heart.

It seemed that the bubbles were endless, that time itself never ended, either. You had eternity together, already dead but without fear of dying. You would hold each other when in stranger's dreams and clutch your hands together when you moved. You both were to live forever, in this land of dreams and endless thrill.

Then came Death again, as if it were stalking you. The last thing you see is her face, distraught, calling your name. Her hand is reaching out towards you, but you are already gone. Soon your sight fades into oblivion, and you can feel the rest of you following suit.

It seems you were doomed even when deceased, your very death nothing but a wistful dream.


	4. Damara/Meenah

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Black!Damara/Meenah (since it won't let me post the spade)
> 
> "Do hearts break once they've stopped beating?" -Corpse Bride

You're sick of her. _So. Fucking. Sick. Of. Her._

She's bullied you, tormented you for what seems like eternity. You no longer have Rufioh - he left you for another highblooded _bitch_ (you won't call him anything crude regarding hoofbeasts, no, that would give him too much credit). You're all alone and that _fucker won't leave you alone_.

You were so happy to kill her the first time. Then you were doubly happy to blow her to smitherins the second time (you had been comtemplating offing yourself, anyway, but you knew it wouldn't stick in god-tier). All of those fuckers deserved to die, but her especially.

She became an obsession, though not one you talked about out loud. Not that any of them but Rufioh could understand you - Mituna may have once been able but not anymore. In time the boiling hatred cooled, and you no longer had any desire to kill her. No, you hated her, that much was obvious. You refused to accept the fact that your hatred had changed to indifference. 

In death, however, she was gone. It gave you time to think. You heard about your Post-Scratch self, how she worked under the Demon until she was killed. You admire her, though you hate how her story ended. Of course the fuschia bitch ended up killing you. It was just typical that she always got her way, making your small victories bittersweet at best, sour at worst.

At least she was gone for good, though. At least, you thought she was. It was thousands upon thousands of sweeps, it felt like, that you were in the bubbles. You saw all of your other 'friends', Rufioh still dating the horse bitch and Aranea still talky as ever and Kankri just making an ass of himself.

(Though he was fun to tease. A little bit.)

("便利な何かのためにあなたの口を使用してください。私を降りたい。"  
"I don't know what you said Damara nor do I want to know. In fact..."  
"あなたが話すとき、私はそれが好きです。それは私になります。角質。"  
" _What?!_ ")

 

You were having fun, rekindling all that lost anger and shoving it towards your own friends. Some of them weren't that bad, even kind and apologetic. Others you despised just as much as in the game. 

And then she showed up. Out of the blue, she was there.

You felt your blood boil as soon as she entered your sight. If you could show any emotion in your eyes they would be sharp spades. The bitch muttered awkward apologies, then misunderstood you as giving her well wishes for the upcoming battle.

"私はあなたが死ぬと思います。火の中に。海に溺れる。私の足の間にあなたの頭を持つ。"  
"You want me to do _what_ between your legs?"  
"次に、あなたのトライデントを自分でファック。"  
"Okay, I don't efin want to know water you're sayin' there."

At the same time you realize that you sort of missed her. In a completely black, hate-filled way. No one lit the fire in your bloodpusher like she did. No one made you want to bleed and claw like she did. You know she hates you too.

She used to, at least. Before you died. 

_It had been so nice, under the stars on your planet. You're both on each other and you're nipping and biting and clawing and there's a little bit of rust mixing with tyrian. You could see the hate in her eyes and feel it beneath her finger tips as she pawed at your undressed torso. Your claws entered the gills along her ribcage and she yelped and crushes you into a kiss after._

_For once you took her insults and bullying not as they were intended, but as a challenge. Your hate changes on the day - sometimes you want to murder her but other times you just want her next to you, covered in a mix of blood. It wasn't a cuddle or anything even similar that you settled into, bloodpushers racing and breath gone. But it was intimate enough that you believed that maybe, maybe you could settle your hatred to one side of the spectrum. The good side, the quadrant side._

_The next morning she's gone and you realize that she didn't even hate your properly enough to make sure that you would be okay._

_Your rage rebuilt itself, becoming a wall. You just wanted to kill her. You just wanted her to die._

"私は、私たちの憎しみのメモリに自分自身をタッチします。"

This time she turns, looks at you. "You do what to the memory of our hate?"

Shit. She wasn't supposed to understand any of that. When did she get so good at - you immediately blame Rufioh. He probably taught her some. 

"あなたは雌犬です。わたしは、あなたが大嫌いです。私は、あなたが死にたい。私はあなたがダイを倍増したいと思います。私は悪魔に魂を養うます。わたしは、あなたが大嫌いです。"

"You want me to die? Whale, guess what? You won. Congratulations. We're all dead now. Hope you're happy as a clam." She turns to walk away but you don't let her. Not this time. You grab her hand. She tries to jerk away but you stop her.

"わたしは、あなたが大嫌いです。これ？これはあなたが私を去ったときのためのものです。ビッチ。"

You kiss her firmly on the lips, biting her bottom one at the same time. A bit of tyrian blood rushes out of the small wound, and you smirk with satisfaction. She looks stunned, confused. Oh well, it's not like you were expecting her to remember that one night so long ago. Especially since she left. 

Then she snorts, wipes the blood off of her lip, and grins. "And you're callin' me a beach? Whale, I guess I deserved that."

You see that it bothers her a little, but she turns away. She isn't even bothering to snap back at you about your speech or your actions or Rufioh or _anything_. It's disconcerting.

"いいえ侮辱？それらが不足する？私は本当に良いのですか？あなたは私が表示されるはずです。暗闇の中で。"

"I'm pretty sure I already have." She cackles and actually walks away. You stare at her disappearing back until she vanishes, at which point you flick off her general direction.

You feel your bloodpusher boil again, and you think maybe, _maybe_ you don't want to kill her after all.

You just want to see her break, a little tyrian blood mixed with rust.


	5. Damara/Kankri

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Damara<3Kankri
> 
> "The Moulin Rouge. A night club, a dance hall and a bordello. Ruled over by Harold Zidler. A kingdom of night time pleasures. Where the rich and powerful came to play with the young and beautiful creatures of the underworld. The most beautiful of these was the one I loved. Satine. A courtesan. She sold her love to men. They called her the 'Sparkling Diamond', and she was the star, of the Moulin rouge. The woman I loved is dead." - Christian, Moulin Rouge

His first thought was of how he shouldn't be here. His second thought was to look back his seat up away from the table. The troll girl was getting a bit too close for comfort.

Why, why, _why_ had Porrim thought it appropriate to bring him here?! This was nothing but triggering content! The girl dropped to her hands and knees, hips swaying as she crawled closer to him. She smiled, tilting her head, allowing her black hair to fall over her eyes. Her tongue flicked out, licking her rusty red lips.

"あなたは、自宅から長い道のりのように見える。来る。投石入手してください。リラックスしてください。私はあなたを慰めましょう。"  
 _"You seem to be a long way from home. Come. Get stoned. Relax. Let me comfort you."_

Then there was the fact that he had no idea what she was saying. It was low Beforus, obviously, but he had never been learned in the language. He only gulped, trying hard to keep his eyes on her face and not her basically exposed breasts ( _trigger, trigger, trigger..._ ). Of course, her face was hypnotizing in its own way, from her piercing eyes to her sultry expression. He gulped again, feeling sweat trickling on the back of his neck.

Oh no. He was not about to turn into Horuss. He needed to find Porrim and _fast_. 

Kankri rose from his seat, but the girl stopped him, rising to a kneeling position and pressing him back down. 

"リラックスしてください。私はあなたが欲しいものを知っている。"  
 _"Relax. I know what you want."_

Suddenly she removed her top and Kankri was quick to turn his eyes elsewhere. The girl smiled, pressing her hand to his cheek and shifting it back towards her. She then rose, moving her hips to the rhythm of the music. 

He was starting to feel a little awkward about the entire event, forcing whatever arousal he had down with the thoughts of anything else. He thought of the speech he was scheduled to give to the other social justice warriors the next day. He thought of some highly triggering pictures of dead grubs he had seen the other day. Finally, when he felt as though he could look at her without stammering, he spoke.

"You know, this is a little uncomfortable. I don't even know your name-"

"I DAMARA. YOU SPEAK THIS. YES?" She continued to sway as she spoke, smiling down at him.

"Er, yes, I do, but I'll have you know that what you're doing is highly inappropriate. Why, think of if someone who was triggered by topless women walked in here and-"

"SHOOSH. YOU TALK. A LOT. JUST ENJOY." She dropped back down to her hands and knees and pressed her breasts together. He swallowed, about to open his mouth, when she pressed her lips against his. "I SAID. QUIET."

He obeyed, though he justified it as trying to think of an argument to catch her on. It definitely wasn't because she was shaking with her eyes directly on his. No, not at all. The show continued, slowly, as though fate wanted to keep him in his seat as long as possible.

No, he definitely couldn't muster a complaint. Even though he wanted to, really.

Suddenly the music ended and Damara tilted her head back with a sigh. She picked her top up off the table and put it back on, much to Kankri's pleasure and (guiltily) disappointment. She slid into the seat next to his, pulling a joint out from underneath the table.

"SO. YOU HERE ALONE?"

"Ye-"

"Kankri? We were just about to leave. Are you ready to go?" The jade-blood glanced curiously at Damara, who only offered her a friendly wave. Porrim returned her attention to the mutant blood. "Well?"

"Yes. I'm quite ready to go. Actually, I'm pretty sure I've had enough for a lifetime. This was a horrifying experience and I'm disappointed that you didn't even consider my vows when you offered to take me out. This could have heavily triggered me, you know-"

"あなたはそれを楽しんだ。嘘をつかない。"  
 _"You enjoyed it. Don't lie."_

"W-what did you say?" The rust-blood only smirked, taking another drag of her joint. 

Porrim shook her head. "Sorry. Look, we'll be outside, alright? Just join us once you're done with your _friend_ here." She winked, then left the room, leaving Kankri blushing.

Damara looked at him. "NEXT TIME. YOU TAKE ME HOME WITH."

That was his cue to leave. He gathered up his things, left her a tip, and bustled out of the door. The only thing he heard leaving was a cackle.


	6. Rose/Kanaya

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> rose<3kanaya
> 
> "the reason i don't go to church is because most churches don't think very much of gay people. or women. or science" — kurt hummel, glee

“Are you sure you want to do this, Kanaya? We don’t have to… I mean, I don’t mind skipping church. I used to do it all the time, anyway.”

The troll shook her head. “Nonsense. There’s no reason to skip such an important ceremony on my behalf. Besides, I’m curious to see how your churches compare to the ones on Alternia.”

Rose scrunched her nose, then huddled closer to her girlfriend. The clouds above were gray and looming, perhaps hinting that they would get a white Christmas. It wasn’t that uncommon in the mountains where Rose was from, but Kanaya had never seen snow. “Alternia had churches?”

Kanaya tilted her head, then shrugged. “In ancient times there were disciples of the Signless. It didn’t really carry over anywhere, though. So, I suppose not. I’m only judging this on what Aranea told me.”

They had arrived at the church early, and Rose slipped into a pew near the back. She wasn’t the greatest church-goer – her mother had often been too drunk to go to church on Sundays and then Rose had been in the game at the peak of her independence – but she knew enough to get by. The only reason she had even thought to go to a Christmas mass was because it was nostalgic. Her mother had taken her, once, and she had watched them light up the massive tree with a sort of superstitious awe. The songs the choir had chosen soundly, well, _heavenly_ (she made a mental note to completely forget that she had even thought of the pun). It had been beautiful and she had remembered every second of it. 

As people began to file in, they cast suspicious glances at Kanaya. Rose glanced at the troll, hoping that she hadn’t noticed the hostile stares. If she had, she was doing a good job of making it seem as though she hadn’t. Her wide yellow eyes were everywhere but the incoming crowd, taking in every single detail. Rose squeezed her hand, and smiled slightly at her. Her girlfriend gave her a confused look but said nothing.

“Excuse me, miss. Might I have a word with you?” Rose looked up, noticing for the first time a boy dressed in white. He was obviously part of the procession, though she couldn’t name his role off the top of her head.

She turned back towards Kanaya, who merely shrugged. “I’ll be fine, Rose. You go ahead.” 

The human stepped out of the pew, then followed the boy out to the lobby. He glanced back through the doors to the main chapel then grimaced. “I hate to bother you, but… is that troll your…” He struggled, trying to find the correct term. After a few moments of watching him struggle, Rose sighed.

“Matesprit? Girlfriend?” 

“Yes, that.”

Rose nodded. “Yes. Was it that obvious?”

He grimaced again. “Unfortunately. Look, please know that this is only looking out for you, but some of our members are a bit… vocal, with their opinions on trolls. Some can’t stand interspecies relationships. Others are a bit more old-fashioned, can’t even stand the thought of two girls together.” The boy shrugged, then sighed. “I have absolutely zero problems with it, but some of the others-“

Rose held up a hand to silence him. He complied. “Thank you for warning me. Rest assured, however, that Kanaya and I have been through a lot. A couple of old people complaining about our relationship is something we can handle.”

“I’m sure. I just wanted to warn you, is all.” He glanced back inside. “The service is going to start soon. I would return to your seat.” He walked off into the still crowded lobby, which was filling quickly with clergy. 

She returned to her seat, which caused the five people not _already_ turned around to stare at her. Kanaya was getting fidgety, groping for Rose’s hand. She squeezed it. The motion didn’t go unnoticed by the church-goers, who began to mutter amongst themselves.

Kanaya was the only troll present. While this didn’t surprise Rose, it did distress her.

“All rise for the procession.” All but a few rose, turning their attention to their books. Whatever they thought of the young couple in the back of the church, it wasn’t worth getting into any trouble over. Some even sent the two sympathetic glances. Still, some kept their eyes directly on the troll and human, their lips not even moving as the procession moved down the aisle. 

As soon as the minister reached the front, one woman snapped to attention. “We have heathens in our midst.” She jabbed a finger at Rose and Kanaya. The troll shrank back, confused. “Can’t you see that they’re here to spy and make fun of us?!”

Muttering began filling the chapel, but throughout it all Rose could only hear a few lines.

“Yeah, we have to get rid of them! Kick them out!”

“Damn trolls, I have to deal with you _every day_ at my job! Now not even my worship is free of you rats!”

“Oh, leave them alone! They’re not bothering anyone!”

“They should just leave. Can’t they see they’re disrupting everything?” 

The confused minister stepped up, raising his hands. It seemed to have an immediate effect, the entire crowd hushed. “Brothers and sisters, you know we welcome all into our church. Even the lost, the confused, and the unusual-“

“I am not unusual! I’m a troll! There’s nothing ‘unusual’ or ‘confused’ or ‘lost’ about us! We belong here just as much as you do!” Her hands were quivering. Rose tugged gently on her fist.

“Kanaya, leave it alone. You’re just going to make it wor-“

“Oh, so now the troll is yelling at our _minister_ after he showed her so much kindness! That’s grounds for kicking out, isn’t it?” It was the shrill woman who first started the complaints. The chapel burst into yells.

“They aren’t hurting _anyone_ by wanting to be here!”

“The Lord accepts all, even the trolls! Let them stay!”

“No, those abominations are committing many disgusting sins! Send them away, it’s a holy day!”

“Oh for the love of _god_ , it’s Christmas! They should be allowed to stay-“

The boy in white slipped from his position at the back of the church, gently nudging Rose on the shoulder. “Would you like to escape?”

She looked at Kanaya, who was still shuddering, then nodded. His lips pulled into a straight line. “Follow me.” He took her hand and led them out into the lobby, only receiving a confused glance from one of the ushers.

“What’s goin’ on in there? You two souls all good?”

“We’re fine. Right, Kanaya?” The troll only nodded, looking down at the tiled floor. 

“Door’s on the right. I’m so sorry about this.” With that the boy disappeared back into the chapel. Rose tugged on her girlfriend’s hand again, leading her out.

They walked for a few minutes before Kanaya finally sighed. “I’m sorry, Rose. I should've just stayed home and let you go to the service.”

“Nonsense. That was the most entertaining mass I’ve ever been to. Besides, it’s not your fault that people were so ready to get into a fist fight over us.” She chuckled, then looked up at the clouds.

They were still gray and looking even heavier with snow than they had before. Kanaya’s eyes lit up once again. Rose smiled. “Well, if we leave now we won’t get caught in the snow. Maybe we can make a little bit of hot chocolate, curl up, watch a movie…?”

 

Kanaya’s lip quirked.

“I’d like that.”


	7. Dirk/Nepeta

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> DirkNepeta
> 
> “To burn with desire and keep quiet about it is the greatest punishment we can bring on ourselves.”  
> ― Federico García Lorca, Blood Wedding and Yerma
> 
> *Note: this version of the fill is not formatted. You can read the formatted version here: http://hs-worldcup.dreamwidth.org/3493.html?thread=546213&posted=1#cmt1075877

AC: :33 > hi dirk!  
AC: :33 > i saw that you were online and purrhaps that you wanted to talk?  
TT: Oh. Hi, Nepeta.  
TT: Not much to talk about, really. Batterwitch drones, Roxy being drunk, Jane and I pining over the same guy, business as usual.  
TT: I think I might just let her have him, though. If that's even a thing you can do with a relationship.  
AC: :33 > don't tell me that you're giving up your purrsuit of mister english!!!  
AC: :33 > you two would be pawsitively purrfect together and you know it  
TT: Well, yeah, I think so too.  
TT: Don't tell anyone I said that though. This shit is strictly confidential between us, right?  
AC: :33 > don't worry! what happens betw33n shippurrs stays betw33n shippurrs :DD  
TT: Oh good god. I definitely am not a shippurr.  
TT: Shipper. You know what I mean.  
AC: :33 > but you have to be! you showed me those pictures you drew of jane and roxkitty together and i know that you are s3333cretly chasing after jake english!  
AC: :33 > and you told me all those things in confidence mister purrince! you can't back out now  
AC: :33 > you're one of us!  
TT: ...I have no idea what I've gotten myself into and I really don't want to actually know.  
AC: :33 > h33h33! :33  
TT: Anyway, how are things going between you and Karcat? Karkitty? Whatever the hell his name is.  
AC: :33 > it's karKAT, with a k!  
AC: :33 > and it's the same as always. he always has his eyes on terezi  
AC: :33 > not that i dislike terezi of course! she's a really great furiend!  
AC: :33 > i just wish that he would purrhaps look at other options, because she's certainly not interested anymore!  
TT: Have you tried talking to him?  
AC: :33 > all the time  
AC: :33 > he just thinks i'm a stupid kitty who has too much time on her hands  
TT: Don't we both technically have too much time on our hands?  
TT: I mean, we're kind of talking about who we'd put ourselves into a relationship with.  
TT: And not, you know, going to go get into a relationship.  
AC: :33 > purrhaps i'd have less time on my hands if he'd notice me fur once!!!  
AC: :33 > dirk?  
AC: :33 > are you still there?  
TT: You know what, Nepeta, you're right.  
AC: :33 > about what? :oo  
TT: Well, we're both hot babes. We're both super smart. We both are really good artists.  
TT: How are we still single?  
AC: :33 > i don't know! with all of those traits i think efuryone would be falling all ofur us h33h33!   
TT: Exactly. But they aren't comin' to us for some reason or another.  
TT: So you know what we have to do?  
AC: :33 > wait patiently and s33 if maybe one day they'll notice us?  
TT: No. We have to step up our game.  
TT: We have to go to _them_.  
AC: :OO > :OO  
TT: Close your mouths, you know I'm serious.  
AC: :II > pawlright, but how do we do that?  
AC: :33 > i mean i've b33n leaving subtle hints efurywhere fur him and he still hasn't noticed!  
AC: :33 > but i can't just go up to him and say that if we get together then my otp can become canon  
TT: Is your OTP really you and Karkat?  
AC: :33 > yes!!! i bet your otp is you and jake so don't judge me!  
TT: ...  
TT: Okay, let's make a pact.  
TT: We're going to tell our respective person - or troll, I guess - how we feel about them.  
TT: And we're going to do this shit directly. No bullshitting around, no being awkward and leaving clues.  
TT: We're just going to go in. Got it?  
AC: :33 > understood!  
AC: :33 > are we doing it now???  
TT: Hell yeah we're doing it now!   
AC: :33 > alright, let's do this!  
AC: :33 > talk to you in a few minutes, dirk!!!

AC: :33 > hi karcat!  
CG: LOOK NEPETA RIGHT NOW ISN'T THE BEST TIME OKAY.  
CG: I'M TRYING TO SPARE JADE FROM THE HORROR THAT IS MY PAST SELF.  
CG: CAN THIS WAIT? THANKS.  
\-- CG is idle! ---  
AC: :33 > um, okay  
AC: :33 > i guess i'll just leave this here then  
AC: :33 > i really  
AC: :33 > wow this is a lot harder than i thought it would be  
CG: COULD YOU PLEASE JUST SPIT IT OUT  
CG: SERIOUSLY I CAN'T DEAL WITH THIS RIGHT NOW.  
AC: :33 > that's okay karcat! purrhaps i'll tell you later!  
CG: THANKS.

 

TT: Hey, Jake.  
\-- GT is idle! --  
TT: Oh. You're not online. Awesome.  
TT: Maybe I'll just message you later. Don't worry about anything, this wasn't urgent.

 

TT: So, how'd it go?  
AC: :33 > he was busy and i didn't want to bother him  
AC: :33 > i'm such a coward! why didn't i just tell him?  
TT: It's okay. Mine was pretty much the same way.  
TT: So, I guess we continue to be single losers who constantly pine after the same people, huh?  
AC: :33 > sure f33ls like it  
AC: :33 > purrhaps it's fur the best  
TT: Yeah, maybe. We'll get them next time, though.  
AC: :33 > definitely! :DD


	8. Jane/Roxy

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Jane<3Roxy
> 
> And when old words die out on the tongue,  
> new melodies break forth from the heart;  
> and where the old tracks are lost,  
> new country is revealed with its wonders.  
> \-- Rabindranath Tagore

Jane had known that Roxy was a free spirit. She had discovered that during their first chat, in which Roxy had been drunk and complaining that she had just lost her cat to a complete stranger, and Jane hadn't known how to respond exact to virtually pat her on the shoulder and tell her that it was going to be okay.

She felt bad for Roxy, especially after finding out that she actually _did_ live in the future by herself. She would be alone forever, if they hadn't started the game. Even then she would never get her fairytale ending. She wanted to be swept off of her feet by a prince, have children, a family. It was something that Jane had experienced but none of the others ever would. Especially since Dirk had no interest in Roxy and neither did Jake, not really. 

In a way she was jealous of Roxy, the way she could do whatever she wanted and consider the consequences later. Her eyes would shine with passion whenever she talked about her interests - science, hacking, programming, cats, anything. Jane lacked that passion, wavering uncertainly between her own interests. Not that she didn't have any emotions, mind, but she hadn't found a love like Roxy had. It all seemed to come so _easily_ to her. Even when she was sad she could keep a smile on her face, as though nothing was wrong.

 

Roxy had known from the beginning that Jane was on a railroad with no twists or changes. The way she had reacted to her blubbering about her cat had been very telling, ending with her awkwardly giving her an 'it will get better' speech and placing a hug in asterisks. No one was that stiff unless they didn't know how to react spontaeneously.

She felt bad for Jane, the way she was controlled and forced into doing whatever the Batterwitch wanted. She didn't know freedom because she was always under _someone's_ thumb. Even now, in the Medium, she hesitated whenever Roxy would suggest doing something extreme. There would be a flicker of curiosity in her eyes, but she would always question whether it was safe, whether it was even allowed by the game's rule set. She didn't know how to express herself openly, always keeping her guard up. Roxy still thought that she could've gotten with Jake, if only she had been brave and confessed her feelings.

In a way she was jealous of Jane, the way she had known her father and been really close to her. Though she had been homeschooled, she still had known others. She had friends outside of their little circle. She still had an opportunity to marry and have children and settle down, if they won the game (maybe she would get with Jake and they could be happy). Roxy admired her curiosity, the way she would be able to critically analyze something at a glance. She wished that she had the same opportunity to build a prankster's gambit as great as Jane's, but she knew that her friend was the queen. She admired her patience and inability to crash even when times were dark.

 

They were curled up next to each other, then, confessing these thoughts and others. They were silent for a few minutes afterwards, absorbing the information they had each gained. Finally, Roxy spoke.

"You know, I don't need a prince to sweep me away. I'm quite fine with princesses as well." 

"I don't know which stories you've been reading, but the princess is always the captive, and the prince rescues her, hoo hoo."

"Not in _Mulan_. And in the original _Little Mermaid_ she sacrifices herself and her happiness so that the prince lives." 

"Really? I was never allowed to watch _Mulan_. They probably thought it would give me too many ideas, ha." 

"Would you mind? Being swept away by a princess?"

"Well, it all just depends really. Is the princess a damsel in distress, because I simply cannot stand such people." 

"Hey, I can't either. We are two hot and sexy princesses and we don't need a man to come and save us!" 

"Hoo hoo! I like the way you think, Roxy." 

"...Hey, Jane?"

"Mhm?"

"...Nah, nevermind."

"Oh, come on. You're never this shy! Spit it out!"

"...Would you be my princess? I mean, if you didn't mind."

There was a moment of silence.

"...You know what, just forget I asked. It was stupid and-"

"Sure, Roxy. I'd like that."

"You would?"

"Yes. Like you said, we definitely don't need men to be happy! I care about you a lot, and that's all that matters, isn't it?"

Roxy smiled.

"Yeah, I think that's all we need."


	9. Rose/Grimdark!Rose

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> black! Grimdark!Rose/Rose
> 
> "My shadow said to me:  
> what is the matter  
> ...Aren't there enough words flowing in your veins  
> to keep you going"  
> -a softer world

At night she could still hear the whispers, feel the soft tendrils in her mind. It didn't help that they were travelling at light speed through their domain.

She could feel their eyes on her at all times, even when she could not see them herself. Sometimes she would tense up without meaning to, though she tried to keep those incidents to herself. She didn't need Dave or anyone to worry about her when they had so much else at stake.

Once she accidentally lost control in Kanaya's arms. The troll had only squeezed her tighter.

The delusions were getting worse, everyday something new would come. The worst came when she was in the bathroom in the morning. She had brushed her teeth and went she went to look in the mirror, she saw darkness and long, narrow cracks. 

She had gasped, blinked, and then they were gone. Rose looked away, and back, and there she was. Except it wasn't her, not anymore. The gray woman in the mirror was wearing her old squiddle dress, though it fit her more snugly than before. her eyes were bright red orbs gleaming in the darkness of the mirror. She smiled crookedly, and opened her mouth.

Her words were screeching and wild, the song of the horrorterrors that Rose could just barely understand herself. _"Return to us. Join us. Darkness is in your heart, we welcome you to our land of dreams."_

"Leave me alone. I'm not interested."

The other-her tilted her head. _"You're lying. I know what you desire. I can feel it in your heart. Your blood sings with our song, Rose."_

"You obviously don't know me very well, because as I said I'm not interested. Go away."

The red eyes glowed brightly, and ethereal tentacles began to swirl around her. They exited the mirror, wrapping around Rose's body. They felt soothing, like a warm embrace from Kanaya or her mother. Like when she had held Jaspers in her arms before he had gone missing. 

_"Last time you did not give yourself fully to us. You would be used wisely. You could help your friends. You are not a being of Light, Rose. The Void calls to you in ways it could call to no one else."_

Rose's eyes fluttered, her purple irises meeting her doppleganger's red ones. She opened her mouth to refuse, but found that she couldn't. After a few moments of struggle, she finally managed to push herself away.

"I told you to leave me alone. Find someone else to do your work." 

The shadow screeched, then the tentacles wrapped around Rose's neck, strangling her. She began to choke, tears streaming down her face as she fell to her knees.

 _"You are a fool, Rose. You could have been so useful... Such a waste..."_

She continued to choke, but flailed her arms, trying to find something to hold onto. She groped the bottle of soap on the counter, then threw it at the mirror. Glass showered around her as it shattered, yet her shade was still there, cackling, watching her-

"Rose! Rose, what's wrong? Are you okay?"

"What the hell is going on- Rose?!"

"WHAT THE FUCK DID I TELL YOU IDIOTS ABOUT KEEPING IT DOWN?"

She let out a muffled sob as Kanaya reached for her, plucking her off of the ground. The tentacles were gone and so was her shadow. The mirror was still in pieces on the floor. "S-she was... right there... s-strangling-"

Dave and Kanaya exchanged a glance, then looked down at her. "Rose, there was no one here. At all. We haven't even passed through a dream bub-"

"SHE WAS RIGHT THERE HOW COULD YOU NOT SEE HER?!" 

This time they were silent, and an awkward air hung about them. Kanaya only clutched tighter to her, and Dave muttered something about going to find Terezi, leaving the two alone together on the bathroom floor. 

They stayed there, silent except for Rose's muffled sobbing, surrounded by broken glass.


	10. Jane/Roxy

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Jane<3Roxy
> 
> "I'm in lesbians with you." --Scott Pilgrim
> 
> *Note: This version is not formatted. You can read the formatted version here: http://hs-worldcup.dreamwidth.org/3493.html?view=1231013&posted=1#cmt1231013

TG: janey  
TG: jaaaaneey  
GG: Yes, Roxy?  
TG: hav i erve told u  
GG: Oh gosh, how drunk are you today?  
TG: shush janey ths is impurtant  
TG: *impurrtant  
TG: *omg its liik a kitty meow :3  
GG: If you're going to be simply going on like that I can't see how this is any more important than anything else you've told me!  
TG: huuush mama roxys got somthng to say  
GG: ...  
TG: hve i ever tldo u tht ur eyes  
TG: are totes th pretiest shade of bluue  
TG: *pretties *blue  
TG: that ive evr seen  
GG: Well, Ms. Lalonde, you certainly spare no detail in your flattery, do you? :B  
TG: theyre lick an oceon  
TG: but in ur EYES  
TG: hwo is tha evn posibibe?!  
GG: I do believe you mean possible there.  
TG: yessss  
TG: that is totes wat i men  
GG: Well, thank you, Roxy!  
GG: Your eyes are quite pretty too! They're very... pink?  
TG: omg yesh that they r  
TG: bt i don want 2 talk bout my eyes whn we can talk abot ur ~EVEYRYTHING~  
TG: ;)  
GG: Ms. Lalonde! If I didn't know any better I'd say you were hitting on me!  
GG: You're making me blush like something else, let me tell you!  
TG: mhm yea somethin lik that lol  
TG: janey ur riiiiidiculus  
TG: *ridiculous  
TG: rru lips r so perf  
TG: like two mmountain rangs smahed 2gther  
TG: to make the perfect set of kissable lisps ;)  
GG: ...Swoon?  
GG: No offense, Roxy, but that one didn't make a whole lot of sense.  
TG: omg sht up i kno it sux  
TG: im trying her  
TG: its so ahrd to concentrate  
GG: Perhaps you should lay off of the alcohol then?  
TG: no no  
TG: im not as good when im sobr  
GG: Well, I'll admit that your pick up lines do have a certain flair when you're intoxicated.  
TG: yes they do  
TG: i havent even  
TG: stareted talkn about  
TG: ur loely boobs ;D  
GG: ROXY NO.  
TG: roxy YES! :D  
GG: I think I'm leaping off of this ship before it even sets sail.  
TG: ur cleavrge is lik  
TG: aw :(  
GG: Tell you what: when you sober up, come to the kitchen. We can bake a cake... maybe do some other things?  
TG: wait is ther suposed 2 be a sugestiv winky fac ther??  
GG: Only for you, Roxy, will I ever do this.  
GG: ;)  
TG: dont u wory ur cutie lil butt  
TG: (whcih i didnt get 2 talk abit either!!!!)  
TG: ill b down aspa  
TG: so dont start anythin w/o me!!! 


	11. Jane/Roxy

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Jane <3 Roxy
> 
> “I'm selfish, impatient and a little insecure. I make mistakes, I am out of control and at times hard to handle. But if you can't handle me at my worst, then you sure as hell don't deserve me at my best.”   
> ― Marilyn Monroe
> 
> NOTE: This version is not formatted. You can read the formatted version here: http://hs-worldcup.dreamwidth.org/3493.html?view=1336229&posted=1#cmt1336229
> 
> (also this is long I apologize)

tipsyGnostalgic [TG] began pestering gutsyGumshoe [GG]!

TG: janne   
TG: jane  
TG: omgm hi kity mew  
GG: Hello, Roxy.  
TG: jan u kno wat  
GG: What?  
TG: im gonn do it  
GG: Oh dear. Do what exactly, Roxy?  
TG: tel distri  
TG: exactaly how i fel  
TG: abot him ;DDDD  
GG: Roxy, we've gone over this. If you do this you're just going to end up hurting yourself and him again.  
TG: no no NOO ths times gonna b diff  
TG: i dint do it RITE las copel times  
GG: Might I suggest sobering up and thinking about this before you actually go through with it?  
TG: IM DOIN IT  
TG: RIT NOW

tipsyGnostalgic [TG] ceased pestering gutsyGumshoe [GG]!

GG: Roxy no  
GG: Oh goodness, this isn't going to end well, is it?

 

tipsyGnostalgic [TG] began pestering gustyGumshoe [GG]!  
TG: why  
GG: Roxy! Are you okay?  
TG: am i  
GG: Dirk messaged me saying that you just randomly disconnected.  
TG: suc a fuckin  
GG: He thought you had passed out at your keyboard again.  
TG: FALUER JANNEY  
TG: OMG I CNTE VEN FCKIN SPEEL *FALURE  
TG: *FAIURE  
GG: *Failure?  
TG: yeh tht  
GG: Dirk wouldn't tell me what happened, but do you want to talk about it?  
GG: You know that I'm willing to listen, Ro-Lal.  
TG: im rycin janen  
TG: y is ti os bad  
TG: no1 wnta me janney  
TG: no on  
GG: That isn't true, Roxy.  
TG: but it is  
TG: im en im evn jus borherig u  
GG: You don't bother me Roxy.  
GG: Well, I guess you do since I use Betty Bother, hoo hoo!   
TG: wow jan that was bad  
TG: btu il aughe   
TG: a lil  
TG: onyl cause im durnk  
GG: As long as it provided you with some cheer, then I have succeeded! :B  
TG: omg somtims  
TG: ur so coot w/ that litl  
TG: :B fac  
TG: its totes adorb  
GG: Aw, thank you Roxy. I do try my best, I'll have you know.  
TG: neverc hange janey  
TG: i swar its lik ur the onyl one who getsi t  
TG: *swear  
GG: I'm sure that Dirk didn't mean anything bad by what he said, whatever it was.  
GG: He thinks the world of you, Roxy. He just doesn't see you in a... romantic way.  
TG: th wost part is tht i kno that  
TG: but tha wasnt wat i ment   
TG: lick u jus kno how 2 lissn  
TG: andho w to be so nic  
TG: evn when im kind a a pushy bith 2 u  
GG: Roxy!!! When are you ever... well, that?   
TG: evry tim i tel u 2 go affer j  
TG: even tho u dot wann  
TG: n thn u lisen to my bs rom probs  
TG: an i nevre do th sam  
GG: Oh, that's not true, Roxy! You're definitely not as pushy as you think you are, anyway, and I would never call you any insulting names!  
GG: It just seems that for some reason I have been elected the group's therapist, hoo hoo. You definitely aren't the only one who comes to me with their problems, Roxy.   
TG: yeh but i don hep  
GG: It's fine. I enjoy helping people, anyway. It makes me feel quite accomplished!  
GG: I really wish that you wouldn't get upset about my problems, however, when you have your own that you have to worry about.  
TG: i stoped cryin   
GG: I could tell - your typing's getting better. :B  
TG: ha thers tha face agin  
TG: :B  
TG: im jus beig stupid 2nite  
TG: im s ooo fukin gon  
TG: wats drik gon sya when i talk 2 him tomowro  
GG: I'm sure he'll ask if you're okay and then you will have a lovely conversation about whatever it is you two talk about.  
GG: I have to let him know you're okay, at any rate.  
TG: he shul jus cut me of  
TG: cept tha were the last 2 peepl on earth  
TG: considring im the last girl 2  
GG: Roxy...  
TG: he prob knws were boned  
GG: Dirk doesn't think of you like that. He loves you very much.  
GG: Besides, even if he doesn't say it, you have lots of wonderful traits that you should be very proud of!  
GG: You're funny, smart, talented, an excellent programmer, pretty, and you can hold your alcohol better than the rest of us combined.  
GG: Those are just off the top of my head as well, so there's lots more things that you should feel really good about.  
TG: wa it prty  
TG: *prety   
TG: *u kno awt i men  
GG: Well, you are. I'm not making that up, if that's what you think!  
TG: is tha theerpaist janney talkin or actual janey  
GG: I was talking as myself, but if you'd prefer it can be from both?  
TG: no n o  
TG: ur ma kin g me blussh  
TG: lik 1 of thos sccool grls in dikrs animes  
TG: ur prity 2 jane  
TG: js stupid cus he doent se tha  
GG: I... Thank you, Roxy.  
GG: That means a lot to me.  
GG: Now you're making me blush, too! :o  
TG: i wan na giv u a kis  
TG: janey  
GG: Excuse me?  
TG: big ol smooch  
TG: rit on th lips  
GG: Um...  
TG: ur jus so muhc beter than dir n j  
TG: y dint i se tha b4  
GG: Roxy, you're heavily intoxicated. I don't think you actually know what you're saying.   
TG: nooo bti ts tru  
TG: i men itss jus i alway thougt if u wer a dude  
TG: itd be perf  
TG: bt lik wat if ur not  
TG: does it rly mater?  
GG: I appreciate the sentiment, really. I think you're quite lovely yourself and have thought the same thing on multiple occasions.  
GG: Goodness, I'm blushing. I'm very glad that you're probably not going to remember this conversation in the morning.  
TG: wait  
TG: u lik me 2  
TG: why dint u say anythin???  
TG: ????????????  
TG: ??  
GG: I'm pretty sure that we were both under the impression that we were brought heterosexual, thus any advances would be mostly awkward. Also, I feared ruining our friendship amidst my denial.  
GG: However, I'm still not convinced that you actually do harbor any actual romantic feelings for me. After all, you were just turned down by Dirk (I'm sorry to say) and I'm the closest thing you can attach to.  
TG: n o  
GG: I'm sorry to be so harsh, because goodness I don't want to be, but I'm not even sure that I like women at all! After all, I still have some sort of feelings for Jake, don't I?  
TG: u can lick bot janey  
TG: *omg lickk ues  
TG: not a crim  
GG: I know that! Just... you're ridiculously drunk right now, it's very late, and I can't really deal with any more heart ache right now. I'm happy to listen to your problems, even smile through your relationship advice, but I do have to draw the line here before things get more awkward.  
GG: If... if you remember this when you're sober, and you want to talk about it, I'm open to it.   
TG: do unot beleiv me?  
GG: I hope you understand why I have my doubts. You started this conversation crying over feeling unloved (which you definitely aren't!) and now you're making a move on me. I'm not sure what to think, honestly, though I know you aren't trying to play with any emotions.  
GG: Just know that I love you, okay, as a friend. I may have a slight crush on you, but that's something something we should discuss tonight.  
TG: il remrmber  
GG: I'm sure you will, Roxy.  
GG: I have to go. My dad is knocking on the door and telling me to get to bed.  
GG: That sounds like pretty sound advice for both of us, don't you think Ms. East Coast? ;B  
TG: yeh ill ttyl  
GG: Good night, Roxy.

gutsyGumshoe [GG] ceased pestering tipsyGnostalgic [TG]!  
TG: wai jan  
TG: damn  
TG: <3 4 u

tipsyGnostalgic [TG] began pestering gustyGumshoe [GG]  
TG: ugh  
GG: Morning sunshine! :B  
TG: alright jane  
TG: be brutally honest w/ me  
TG: how drunk was i  
TG: cause i feel like ive been run over by a truck  
TG: like a bazillion times  
GG: Well...  
TG: omg how bad was it  
GG: Have you talked to Dirk yet?  
TG: oh god no did i confess my love 2 him again  
GG: To put it bluntly...  
GG: Yes.  
TG: NOOOOOOO  
TG: son of a bitch   
TG: ill apologize to him later omfg i cant believe i did that again  
TG: wat else  
GG: Not much, we just talked for a while after that. Well, more like you talked and I gave you gentle words of encouragement.  
TG: so basically business as usual  
GG: Basically.  
TG: wait  
TG: there was something else  
TG: ugh why does my head hurt so bad  
GG: Have you taken advil yet?  
TG: yes  
TG: it hasnt kicked in yet tho  
TG: WAIT I REMEMBER  
GG: Really?   
TG: yeah  
TG: we talked about u and j  
GG: ...Yes. I suppose we did.   
TG: u sound disappointed  
TG: i said something stupid last nite didnt i? :(  
GG: No, Roxy. You didn't say anything stupid.   
GG: Well, nothing I would consider stupid. Your own opinion may vary.  
TG: ...  
TG: omg  
TG: WAIT NOW I DO ACTUALLY REMEMBER  
TG: i owe u a big ol kiss  
TG: cause we totes have the hots for each other  
GG: Well I -   
GG: Wait, you actually remembered?  
TG: dont sound so shocked  
TG: also im bringing up last nights chat as a cheat sheet  
TG: but i did remember the other part on my own  
TG: and u saaaaaiiiid that we could talk about this  
TG: when i was sober  
TG: which i am ;)  
GG: Well, the offer still stands. I'm willing to talk about it if you are.  
TG: yes  
TG: id like that a lot


	12. Dave/Damara

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> damaradave  
> "Megara. My friends call me Meg. Or at least, they would if I had any."

The first thing Dave thought when he saw he was that his Bro would absolutely _love_ her.

Second thing was that she looked exactly like crazy Aradia, except maybe taller and definitely with larger horns.

Third was that, unlike with Aradia and her insane 'corpse party' smile, she looked rather... sad. Oh, she had a smirk on her face and her entire posture just screamed 'don't fuck with me' but he could see past it. After all, he had been playing the cool kid for his entire life. He knew when people were actually what they appeared to be and she definitely was not.

When he approached her she was leaning against a hive, joint in hand. She maybe glanced at him - seriously fuck those blank eyes - but otherwise didn't acknowledge his presence. He awkwardly went up to the building and leaned up next to her. This she _did_ notice, because she turned towards him. 

"YES?"

"Just thought you looked like you needed some company. Figured that since my friends are dicking around with all your other dead bros I might as well find one for myself." He shrugged.

She made a face. "NOT. BROS." 

"Oh."

They sat there in an awkward silence for a couple of minutes before she turned back to him. "DAMARA. DAMARA MEGIDO."

"Uh, Dave. Dave Strider. Nice to meet you, I guess." He held out a hand. She looked down at it and he pulled it awkwardly back towards his body, playing it off as he rubbed the back of his head. 

Another awkward silence ensued.

"WHY YOU HERE? SHOULD BE WITH OTHERS. LIKE THE BITCH. AND THE LOUD ONE." 

"I'm guessing the loud one is Karkat... uh, which one is the bitch, exactly?"

She shrugged. "THEY ALL BITCHES. IN THEIR OWN WAY." 

"So are you usually this bitter or did I just catch you in a bad mood?"

Damara chuckled. "誰も行わないときたわごとを与えるのは難しい。私と一緒に投石を取得。裸入手してください。"

Dave blinked. "I didn't know you spoke Japanese."

"EAST BEFORAN. NOT HUMAN LANGUAGE."

There was another pause. "Hey, are you okay? I mean, I'm not trying to pry or anything..."

The words caused her to freeze completely. She had been bringing up her joint but she just stopped. Her eyes grew wide and her mouth opened slightly. Her lips began to move but no words came out. Finally her brow furrowed and her expression changed to a pout as she placed the joint between her lips.

"Right. Well, maybe I'll just... go. If you don't want to talk or anything. Got all these sweet rhymes I've gotta work on. Not that they're going anywhere for another year or so but I gotta keep on top of the game."

He turned to leave, and then she caught his arm. "THANKS. FOR COMING OVER HERE. I MEAN. I SORRY I NOT GOOD HUMAN LANGUAGE. NOT VERY OPEN. NOT MANY FRIEND TOO. IF YOU WANT TALK NEXT TIME... MAYBE I BE MORE OPEN?"

He nodded, once, and she released him. She returned attention to the joint, making it clear that he was dismissed. 

If there was one thing he thought after speaking with her, it was that the 'don't fuck with me' attitude was a very real thing for her.


	13. Nepeta/Karkat/Gamzee

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Nepeta♥Karkat♦Gamzee♠Nepeta 
> 
> "No cat out of its first fur can ever be deceived by appearances. Unlike human beings, who enjoy them.”   
> ― Peter S. Beagle, The Last Unicorn

She doesn't understand how she can love him but he can be pale for _him_. 

He killed Equius. It didn't even matter that he had killed her once, too. He had _killed Equius_.

It was really only because of Karkat that she her hatred didn't grow into something more deadly. She would have loved to claw his face off but instead she settled for watching him from afar. Every time her matesprit would curl into a pile with him her eyes would narrow and she'd dig her claws (both sets) into the floor. 

Rose and Jade called her jealous.

That was wrong. She wasn't jealous, she just _knew_. She knew every single one of his motions, how fast his heart was beating, his nervous twitches.

_His pupils would shrink and his nostrils would flare and his ears would twitch._

No one in their little group would ever call him harmless; they weren't that stupid. But they saw him as less of a threat, if that meant anything. Even Kanaya had lowered her guard around him, and Terezi had even awkwardly accepted him back into their social group. Whenever it seemed like he was overwhelmed, Karkat would clutch his arm and shoosh him until he was calm again.

To her it was a waiting game. How long before Karkat's (amazing, in her opinion) pale talents would cease to work? How long before they all died at _his_ hands again? The game had given them another chance, but now they were on their own, with a wild card in their hand. She knew enough about the habits of nervous beasts that she could recognize when one was about to charge.

It wasn't easy to forget her hatred, either, especially when her matesprit was her moirail. Even when they curled together, bloodpushers thumping in unison, she could taste _his_ scent on Karkat. It was easy to push out of her head, at least for the night. But then she'd see him again and all she would want to do is rip his skin open a little, letting purple run down his cheek.

Karkat tried his best to quell her rage, even though it wasn't his job. By all rights she should have abandoned their relationship for simply stepping on Equius' toes. She couldn't, though, not when she had longed for him for such a time and then he had finally accepted her! She was so flushed for him, anyway, even with the clown lingering behind them.

It confused her, though, how no one else could see it. In the morning when Karkat would leave her side to join his moirail, she would watch. 

Was she truly the only one who saw the wild, uncaged beast?


	14. Jane/Meenah

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> blackrom!Jane/Meenah
> 
> "You didn't kill him. He would have killed you, but you didn't kill him."  
> "So? He was stupid. If I killed everyone who was stupid, I wouldn't have time to sleep."   
> -Tamora Pierce, In the Hand of the Goddess

"You're insufferable, Ms. Peixes. You can't just... ugh."

The troll tapped the diagram, fuchsia lips curling into a snarl. "Water's so wrong with ma plan, Crocker? Got somefin to say aboat it or not?"

The recently appointed head of Crockercorp placed a well manicured finger on the diagram, right near where Meenah was pointing. "Oh, I have _a lot_ to say about your plan, Peixes. You can't just run around _assassinating_ the heads of other companies on a whim! Actually, _you can't do that period_!"

"You have abshoalutely NO faith in me 'n ma team, Crocker. We get in, krill the fucker, leave beshore anyone efin seas us. Simple."

"You're missing the point, Meenah! I have no doubt that you _can_ do it, but my reason is-"

"Look, _sis_ ," the troll spat out the word as if it were a piece of filth in her caviar, "I don't know where you get the idea that you're the big head of the company-"

"I _am_ the head of the company!" 

Meenah grinned. "And I'm the fuckin' head of advertisin' and marketin'. And I say that in order to maximize our sails - it's a boat pun get it? - we knock out big bad Kellogg. You'll also remember that our dearest genetic clone-slash-great grandma left _me_ in charge of the military branch of the company."

Jane frowned. "Didn't I get rid of that branch? Since, you know, _we're not waging war on anyone_?"

"Whale beach, I reinstated that shit as soon as I heard the news."

The human adjusted her red glasses, and pursed her lips. "We will not be assassinating the head of Kellogg, Meenah. Not only will everyone notice that he's dead, _everyone_ will know it was Crockercorp that did it."

"Not if we're-"

" _Yes_ even if you're as secretive as you claim to be. Who else would want to assassinate the head of a baking company but another baking company? I would suggest using your head for once, Peixes, but no point in that since you keep moving it closer to the chopping block."

The troll scowled, tapping her trident on the floor. Three other trolls burst through the doors dramatically at her bidding. Jane rolled her eyes. "Yo, tell Serk that we're off for tonight."

Two of the trolls glanced at each other. "You mean for your date or...?"

"Oh, shell nah we're still on for that. I meant that _otter_ thing. She'll know water you mean when you tell her." With that she waved them off, and they hustled out of the door. Jane leaned over the diagram, smirking.

"So, you and Ms. Serket...?"

"Shut the fuck up, Crocker."


	15. Roxy/Condesce

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> blackrom!Roxy/Her Imperial Condescension
> 
> "Never run from anything immortal. It attracts their attention." -Peter S. Beagle, The Last Unicorn
> 
> Note: This version is not formatted. Formatted version is here: http://hs-worldcup.dreamwidth.org/3493.html?view=1423525&posted=1#cmt1423525
> 
> Also: AU where Roxy, Jane, Jake, and Dirk are alive when humanity is enslaved, and the Condesce uses mind control to keep humanity under her control.

)(IC: yo lil lalonde  
)(IC: where u think ur goin  
)(IC: cant hide from me beach  
)(IC: i kno exactly where u are 38)

She shouldn't have run. She should have stayed in the shadows and played the brainwashed pawn, like Dirk and Jane and Jake had done. But she had inherited her mother's recklessness and was now about to pay the price.

The sea queen had first struck down Jane, as the girl was her Heiress. Now Jane was one of the queen's slaves, just like the rest of them. And she was chasing Roxy now, just around the corner, face painted white and black and gray in a domino mask. From her spot around the wall Roxy could hear little 'hoo's being made from her old friend, once a pleasant sound but now twisted and strangled.

)(IC: u kno ur just makin this harder on yoshellf  
)(IC: surrender now n no one else has to get hurt

Jake had been the second. Unlike Jane, he hadn't survived, mostly because the sea queen didn't care enough to try and save him. He was expendable, unlike the Heiress. Instead she used his body, piercing him with the trident and dangling him above the stone halls. When Roxy saw him she screamed, tears piercing her eyes.

)(IC: lookit that  
)(IC: lil english matches his grandma now   
)(IC: 38)

She heard Jane's footsteps behind her and she bit back a sob, running. It was all her fault. She shouldn't have tried to fight, not like this. She should've stayed behind, helped Dirk with his plans for a resistance.

Oh god Dirk...

)(IC: last warnin guppy  
)(IC: u surrender and i dont touch mini strider  
)(IC: on ma honor 

She didn't listen, of course. It was too late. Dirk wouldn't want her to return for his sake anyway... at least she hoped. 

)(IC: wow ur one shellfish bad beach ill give u that  
)(IC: lettin ur fronds die instead of u  
)(IC: mad respect from this ruler

She heard his screams next, and she let out a strangled sob. He had to be dead, there was no way that the sea witch would let him live-

Roxy screamed as she turned another corner. Dirk was there, badly mangled. His face was torn in several different places, then clumsily painted over in white. His lips were sewn shut, and he had one eye missing. He moved towards her, his gait awkward and stumbling. 

"No no no no..." 

She backed up against the wall of the hall, and looked up. Jake's body had been moved to be above her. Dirk was stumbling towards her like something out of a horror movie. She could hear Jane coming closer, fork tapping on the ground.

)(IC: game ova lil beach  
)(IC: weve both had fun today havent we   
)(IC: 38)

Roxy slid to the ground, slumping against the wall. Jane arrived next to her, pressing the points of her fork into Roxy's chest. 

The girl looked up, finding the camera from which the sea witch was watching. 

"You win."


End file.
